27 October 2015

Miss You Messages

10/27/2015 12:22:00 PM  , , , , ,  No comments


If u wanna know how much I miss u, try to catch rain drops, the ones u catch is how much u miss me, and the ones u miss is how much I miss 

I have rusgulla,burfee,chamm chamm,gallibee, gullab gamman. but their taste is like chilly,u want to know why ? Becuase u r not with me. I m missing u so much my sweet !!!! 

If u open my heart, guess what you are gonna see? Its you. True loves are hard to find so I kept you.

If u think i miss u all the time u r wrong i miss u only when i think about u but Damm it i think u all the time i miss u.

If a smile could be a rain drop i would wish that it keeps raining throughout ur life so that there may be no place for tears in ur life.

Its hard to say hello because it might be goodbye. Its hard to say Im okay because sometimes Im not. But its easy to say I miss you coz I know that I really do.

If U like me ya hate me both is advantageous & beneficial to me!!!Bcoz if u like me Ill be in ur heart & if U hate me Ill be in ur mind..

I always knew that looking back on my tears would someday make me laugh, but I never knew that looking back on my laughter would someday make me cry. Miss you.

If 100 moments of happiness u have 1 of them is the result of my prayers if four eyes r watching u with love 2 of them r my eyes if no 1 cares u then it means that i,m not in this world.

if i would know that i m gonna die tomorrow, ill spend 23 hours with u and if u wonder what about the last hour. that ill find someone who can take care of u..love you always..miss u..

1 + 1= 2 eyes look at you 12 + 12= 24 HOURS THINKING of u.. 3 + 4= 7 days in a week missing u.. 1 + 11 = 12 months i always need a sweet like you..

I heared some whisper ur name,but when i turned around 2 see u who it was , i notice i was alone, i realized it was my heart telling me that I MISS U.

In my life I learned how 2 love 2 smile 2 be happy 2 be strong 2 work hard 2 be honest 2 be faithful 2 forgive but I couldnt learn how.. 2 stop remembering u.

I heard someone whisper ur name, but when I turned around to see who it was, I notice I was alone, then I realize it was my heart telling me that I miss u.

I miss u wen ur far away.I think about u every nite & day.Even if we cant b 2gether.I will miss u now & forever!

I hide my tears when I say your name, but the pain in my heart is still the same. Although I Smile & Seem Carefree, There is no one Who misses you more than ME!

C.L.I.C.K. means : C= cant live without u L= love u I= i miss u C= care about u K= kiss from my heart 2 u So whenever u miss me just say CLICK.

In The Flower My Rose Is You, In The Diamond My Kohinoor Is You, In The Sky My Moon Is You, Im Only Body My Heart Is You, Thats Why I Always MISS YOU!.

Heres a little hug for you To make you smile when youre blue, To make you happy if youre sad, To let you know life aint so bad!

I know U R So-So-So -B-U-S-Y But..Take.. 3 Seconds to think of me 1.. .. 2.. .. 3........ So Sweet. now continue ur work..(MISS U).
I hv learned how to luv, to smile, to b happy, to b strong, to work hard to b honest, to b faithful, to forgive but I couldnt learn how to stop missing u. 

I may seldom tell u how special u are, I may not b able to reach u coz were both busy, but in spite of all, u know u are someone I really miss & care about.

Can u keep a secret? Between me & u You promise? I really need to tell u this.. Well.. I MISS U..

A simple ‘HELLO can b so sweet.. H:How r u? E:Everything ok L:Like to c u L:Love to hear u O:Obviously I MISS U!

Close ur eyes ..,Relax ur body.. and stop breathing as long as U can..Now breath..I miss u as much as u missed the air..

A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T V W X Y Z have I missed something? yes.. i missed U.

4 Facts of life: Never say sorry 2 one who loves u,Never say bye 2 one who realy needs u,Never blame a person who trust u,Never forget a person who really cares for u..! I MISS U..!

143 is numerically saying I MISS YOU What if I ask u 23423 same as DO YOU MISS ME TOO? Would u answer me 312 same as YES I DO

A hug for you means I need you.A kiss for you means I love you. A call for you means Im missing you.

3 Little Hearts I m sending u 3 little hearts to remind u 3 things, I m HERE, I CARE and i MISS U.

Good Time,Bad Time,Day Time,Night Time,Work Time,Off Time,Happy Time,Sad Time,Sleep Time,In the Mean Time..I MISS YOU all the Time

I miss you so, here around me, so many people, but yet so alone. I miss your lips, your lovely smile, I miss you each day more and more!

Close your Eyes, Relax your Body, And stop your Breathing as long as you can.. NOW BREATH... I Miss you as much as YOU MISSED THE AIR!

God gave u 2 legs to walk, 2 hands to hold, 2 ears to hear, 2 eyes to see. But why did he give u only 1 Heart? Probably bcoz he wants u to look for the other.

Ever since you ve left i ve realised that a part of one`s Life is made of someone else`s life , I MISS THAT PART . I MISS YOU.

Days r too busy. Hours r too few. Seconds r too fast. but ther is alwys a tym, for me to ask how r u? hope u r fine.. miss u..

Do u know Do u know, what i say, what i think, what i feel, what i think, what i wish, U want to know? I MISS U SO MUCH.

In My Lyf..I learned how 2 smile.How 2 Laugh.How 2 HardWork.How 2 Love.How 2 cry..but i neva learned how 2 stop MISSING YOU..em MISSIN YA SO MUCH Dear.

Earth may stop rotating, birds may stop flying ,candles may stop melting,fish may stop swiming,heat may stop beating but i never stop missing u...

Theres no Special reason for this msg, I juz wanna steal a single moment out of ur busy life & hope I can make u smile n say: I Miss U.

1+1=2 eyes always wanna c u...,5+1= senses always feel u...,5+2=7 days i miss u...,7+5=12 month i wanna protect ur friendship 2 me....@

If your love is true,must be come back.

I love you today,As i did from the start.l"ll love you forever, With all of my heart,so i love you .
  
Distance does to love what wind does to fire, extinguishes the weak and fuels the strong. Your love is my strength.

I thought about you all day. I expect tomorrow to be the same.

A piece of my heart is always missing when you're not with me.

All I need is you, right here.

The shortest word I know is "I". The sweetest word I know is "LOVE". And the person I never forget is "YOU".

Even if I was the busiest person in the world, I'd always find time for you.

I can't wait until the day I can wake up right next to you.

When I'm alone, I think of so many things to say to you but when I have the chance to tell you, I go speechless.

Even if I spent the whole day with you. I will miss you the second you leave.

When it rains, you don't see the sun, but its there. I hope we can be like that. We won't always see each other, but we will always be there for one another.

Every minute feels like an hour, every hour feels like a day, every day feels like forever, but I will wait forever and a day for you.

I wish you were here holding me tight in your arms.

I will wait for you because honestly I don't want anyone else.

It's everything about you that makes this distance so worth it.

My very soul demands you.

The longer the wait the sweeter the kiss ...

The few hours I spend with you are worth the thousand hours I spend without you.

I can’t stop thinking about you.

It’s so hard to be away from you.


Babe can you build me a time machine ... so every time that we are apart I can fast forward the days until the next time I can see you. I miss you baby xoxo


You’re always on my mind.


I miss your beautiful face.


I miss your handsome face.I’m in the most boring meeting and all I can think about is you. I can’t wait to see you.


I’m working late tonight. All I want to do is see you instead!


I've been missing you today.


I wanna write 'miss you' on a rock and throw it at your face so you know how much it hurts to miss you.


You just walked out the door but I miss you already.


I m sending u 3 little hearts to remind u 3 things, I m HERE, I CARE and i MISS U


Do u know, what i say, what i think, what i feel, what i wish, U want to know? I MISS U SO MUCH.


Romantic Text Messages to Send When You Missing Someone


I Miss You!


In the flower my rose is you.
In the jewel my diamond is you.
In the sky my moon is you.
I am body my heart is you.
That’s why I always miss you.


Whenever I miss You,
I wont look for you in my dreams
or try to hear your voice in your messages.
I just put my right hand across my chest and feel you!


I would cross a thousand oceans
just to hold you tight.
I would climb a thousand mountains
just to be with you every single night.


Darling I miss you so much.


Every time i miss you, a star falls.
So if you ever look up at the sky and the stars are gone,
its because you made me miss you too much!


Today i miss u
Yesterday i missed u.
Don’t worry about tomorrow, i ll always miss u, and that is a promise. Miss U Forever.


I miss your joy and laughter I miss your company you are an inspiration to me you are my muse, my mentor.


I miss your smile.


I miss the touch of your hand in mine.


Your love warms me like the morning sun shine.


I miss your breath on my ear as we embrace.


I miss the softness of your cheek when I touch your face.


My eyes are hurting bcoz I can’t see you, My arms are empty bcoz I can’t hold you, my lips are cold bcoz I can’t kiss yo but, My heart is breaking bcoz I’m not with you!


If u think i miss u all the time you are wrong i miss you only when i think about u but damn it i think you all the time i miss u sweetheart.


(I MISS U)are 3 words, But take 3 seconds to read, 3 minutes to think, 3 hours to understand, 3days to demonstrate, 3weeks to explain and whole life to prove it!!!!!


I miss you so,
here around me,
so many people,
but yet so alone.
I miss your lips,
your lovely smile,
I miss you each day more and more


Every moment I’m not with you feels like an eternity.


I’m trying to think of something I rather be doing than making out with you ... I got nothing.


My bed misses you.


I’m so disappointed I have to work late today. I miss you so much.


I’m stuck at work late. I would love it if you could drop by. I could sneak you in for a make-out. :)


I hate being away from you. I miss you so much.


This place would be so much better if you were here.


I've spent 98% of today thinking about you.


I can’t wait to see you tonight.


Miss You Quotes for Long Distance Relationships


Long Distance Quotes & Missing You Messages


I may seldom tell u how special u are, i may not be able to reach u coz we're both busy, but in spite of all, u know u are someone i really miss and care about.


I miss you ... I need you ... More and more .... each day ... I love you ... more than words ... can ever say


I miss you so, here around me, so many people, but yet so alone. I miss your lips, your lovely smile, I miss you each day more and more!


If I had a penny for every time I thought of you, I'd still miss you, but at least I would be rich enough to come and see you..!!


If I could hold you close again, I’d never let you go.


If I had a single flower for every time I think about you, I could walk forever in my garden.


Parting is all we know of heaven and all we need to know of hell.


What is the opposite of two? A lonely me, a lonely you.


The reason it hurts so much to separate is because our souls are connected.


I think about you constantly, whether it's with my mind or my heart.


I miss you reminding me to get to bed early.


I miss it when it rains and your hair goes all curly.


I miss how you scrunch up your nose when you laugh.


I miss how you smell when you get out of the bath.


I m gonna smile & Make U think... I m happy I m gonna laugh So U don't see me cry I m gonna let U go in style & Even if it kills Me I m gonna Smile


I always knew that looking back on my tears would someday make me laugh, But I never knew that looking back on my laughter would someday make me cry. Miss you so much.


I do it foru. The spirit of love Follows me always & my feelings fly 2u away I miss u so!


I don’t understand why; it is like you gave me wings then you told me it is illegal to fly


I heard someone whisper your name but when i turned around to see who it was I notice i was alone and realized it was my heart telling me that I MISS U !


I hide my tears when I say your name, But the pain in my heart is still the same. Although I Smile and seem Carefree, There is no 1 who misses you more than me.


I hide my tears when i say your name but tha pain in my heart is still the same.though i smile and carefree, there is no one who misses u more than me. *I MISS U***


I May Not Be a clock That may Text you 24hrs a Day But My Heart Will be Like a Clock That will not stop Caring and Saying you're always Remembered. Miss you


I miss the laughs I used 2 get from you, I miss the talks we used 2 have. And above all, I just miss the true and real U...


I miss the tears, I miss the laughter, I miss the day we met & all that followed after, Sometimes I wish I could always be with you The way we used to be, Now & forever, I will always think of you Now & forever, I will always be with you


" I Miss You " it will always be the second best thing but after, " I Love You "


I MISS YOU in every beats of heart, In every blink of my eyes, In every second of Time and... In every moment of the Day !
I miss u in every beats of my heart,in every blink of my eyes,in every second of time and .... in every movements of day,I MISS UUUUUU...


I only want you to know that my life is missing you There are no limits to our dreams, just believe they do mean something to us.


I have 100 resons why i like you 10,000 reasons why i care for you and 10 million reasons why i miss you but i just have 1 thing to tell you:i thank god for having you.


I will never ever forget you. Okay; I will only forget you when 1+1=3


Care 4 the 1 who Shares with yoU Share with the one who Knows yoU Know the one who Misses yoU MISS the one who well Wishes yoU Wish you a very Good Luck. Have a nice day.


Click Down If You Miss Me. Oh! It means U Miss Me. Waao! You Miss Me A Lot. You Really Miss Me.


Close your Eyes, Hold your Head up high, Relax your Body, And stop your Breathing Do not Breathe as long as Possible .... NOW BREATHE … I Miss you as much as YOU MISSED THE AIR !


Dont Search Any Good Or Particular Msg to Send Me. . I shall Be Satisfied With An Empty Msg. Because I shall Just Be Happy By Knowing .That My Friends Still Remember Me!


Each time I miss you, a star falls down from the sky. So, if you see the sky all dark with no stars, its all your fault because you made me missing you that much


Eyes: To Look at you. Hands: To Pray for you. Mind: To Care for you. Heart: To Love you. And Legs: To Kick you, If you forget Me. So Never forget me.
Fake friends; Laugh/mad on you without real reasons, never remember you unless they need/use you, never around when you need them


Good Friends; Real friends are those who care without hesitation, who remember you without limitation, who trustful without suspicion, and who love even without communication.


Having No Communication with U 4 A While Is Like Drinking Coffee Without Sugar, Its Not Complete Or Should I Say My Life Isn't Complete with U r Not Beside Me I Miss U Soooo much my baby


If you think that I miss you all the time, you are wrong, I miss you only when I think about you, but Damm it I think about you all the time.


If U were flowers I would not pick U! I’ll let U grow in the garden & cultivate U with luv, And care so I can keep U with me forever. Miss so much my flower !


If you truly love Nature, you will find beauty everywhere.


In The Flower My Rose Is You, In The Diamond My Kohinoor Is You, In The Sky My Moon Is You, I'm Only Body My Heart Is You, That's Why I Always MISS YOU!


It is hard to say hello because it might mean goodbye. It is hard to say I am okay because sometimes I am not.
But it is very easy to say I miss you because I really really do !


It is somewhat funny how pictures can bring back so many memories of your life and help you remember details you did not even think about.


It is true that we do not know what we have got until we lose it. But it is also true that we do not know what we have been missing until it arrives. Well, I think I know what I am missing, but I do not know when will you arrive to me? !!!


It is very difficult to say Goodbye and it is even harder when its some one yo love It becomes ever worse when there is nothing can ever be done by refusing to let go!!! so do your best before it becomes the worse case that you can not do anything! because it is never easy to say Goodbye for ever!!


It may sound simple and small, nothing unique or original... but yet it means so much & takes a courage to say it, I want to tell you that I Miss You so much...


It may sound simple, nothing unique or original… But yet it means so much & takes courage 2 say, I want to tell you ‘I Miss You so much!’


May the angels protect U.. May sadness 4get U.. May goodness surround U.. May happiness be round U.. and may God always bless U..!!


Memories play a very confusing ROLE. .They make u laugh wen u remember d time u cried 2 gether.! But make u cry wen u remember the time u laughed 2gether.


Missing you could turn from pain to a pleasure, if I only knew that you were missing me too. Miss you sweetheart...


my eye miss you my feels love you my hands need you my mind call you my life is you I will die without you


My eyes are hurting because I can"t see you. My arms are empty because I can"t hold you. My lips are cold because I can"t kiss you but. My heart is breaking because I"m not with you.


MISS U SO MUCH Wherever I go I carry u in my thoughts, Whatever I do


Never look for Beauty,It will fade away 1 day. Never look for good Skin,it will grow old 1 day. But look for a loyal heart which will Miss U Everyday!!.. . . Miss U my sweat baby


Never Say Goodbye But Say See You Soon. -Title of a sad song
Scientists Saying: Sun will loose its heat, Moon can fall from the sky, Stars may explode in front of our yes, Earth may stop rotating, Nothing is certain, but one thing's for sure is: I Never Ever Stop Missing YOU No Matter What Happen!!


Sometimes I forget to say hi, Sometimes I forget to reply, Sometimes my message doesn’t reach you, But it does not mean I forget you. I am just giving you time to Miss me.


Sometime I don't Say HI. Sometime I don't Say REPLY. Sometime I don't Say MSG YOU. But It doesn't mean that I forget You. It means that I am giving you TIME TO MISS ME.


Sometimes life gets o busy I cant even say Hi make a call Or send a reply But it doesnt mean i forget U Bcos in my mind I keep U FOREVER Good day


So be careful how to choose your friends and how to plan your future. Good Luck.


Sumtimes U MISS me sumtimes I do, Sumtims U HURT me sumtims I do, Sumtims U SMS me sumtims I do, Sumtims U FORGET me dats d only thing I never ever do.


Sweetest part in life is 2 carry all d memories in life. But.Toughest part is 2 say good bye to the person who is behind those memories!!!,


tell the sky not to be so blue tell the rain to stop falling down tell the word to stop turning but do not tell me to stop missing u!!!


The worst way 2 miss someone, is 2 have them sitting right next to you and you know you can never have them.


The Worst Feeling Isn't Being Lonely ... Its Being Forgotten By Someone You Could Never Forget ... 


Tear is the silent language of LOVE. When the tears come with reason, u got some problem. But when tears come without any reason, u miss someone…


They say if you are unable to sleep that is because there is someone thinking of you. In our case, sure you know who is that person that misses you. That is why if you can’t sleep, sorry, I can’t help it.


There is no Special reason for this message, I just want to steal a single moment out of your busy life and hope I can make you smile and say: I Miss you so much.


There will be another month, another winter, another summer, another year, another smile and maybe another tear ... but never ever another friend like.


This Love, IsLove, TheLove, BestLove, WayLove, ToLove, SayLove, ThatLove, ILove, ReallyLove, MissLove, YouLove, SoLove, MuchLove, Now Read It again without Love.
Those we love never go away They walk beside us everyday... Unseen...Unheard... Untouchable...Unforgettable... Still near...still loved… Still Missed…still very dear… Miss you so much!
Treat everyone with politeness even those who are rude to you not because they are not nice but because YOU are nice…


What did you do to me! I know my body is here, but my mind is always with you! and my heart always missing you, what’s going on.


When daylight turns to a darkened hue, The lovely stars hinting at you, Your heart beat tells You something true, That someone is badly missing you .


When I see you I smile, When I miss you I cry, but when am with you I have nothing 2 say because the urge 2 kiss you takes my breath away. I love you and even when I am with you I still miss you....


When Nights are long and Friends are few, I sit by my Window and think of you. A silent whisper a silent tear, with all my Heart i wish you were here.


When I am walking in front of you – I am protecting you. When I’m beside you I am there for you, when I’m behind you I am watching over you. When I am alone I am thinking of you.


when i close my eyes before sleeping i watch u in the dark, When im sleeping i watch u in my dreams, When i open my eyes i found u before my eyes..And then I start Missing u for all the Day…


When nights are long and friends are few…I sit alone and think of you…With lovely heart and silent tear…All I wish is you to be here….miss you !!!!!


Whenever I miss you I won’t look 4 u in my dreams or try to hear ur voice in ur msgs. I just put my right hand across my chest and I feel YOU.
who loses money loses much who loses a freind loses much more who loses faith loses much much more but who loses you lose all


Within you I lose myself... Without you I find myself Wanting to be lost again.


yestarday i ask my heart some thing is missing what happen to you. my body answered, their is no heart! omeone tooked it! i miss you my dear


You r far frm Me, Bt ur presence s alwys here in my Heart I cant cum 2 c u Bt my msg can reach u 2 say- "Im Rememberng U" I Miss u a lot dear.


You know! You are such a nice person, Our friendship means a lot to me, That if we were the last people on a sinking ship & There is only 1 life vest, I’ll... Hmm ... Ah.. Ehh..... Okayyy I am gonna miss you greatly, that’s for sure!


You may Miss me. You May Ignore Me. You May Even 4get Me Bt 1 Day If U Want To SEE Me, Don't Search Anywhere Just Watch Ur Shadow I Will B There..


You must be a good thief because you have stolen my heart, You must be a good runner because you are running in my mind, but I am always a bad shooter because I always miss you.


You must be a thief because you stole my heart. You must be tired because you are always running through my mind successfully. And maybe I am really bad shooter because I keep missing you all the time.


You must be a good runner because you are always running in my mind, you must be a good thief, because you have stolen my heart, and I am always a bad shooter because, I Miss You Always...!!!




Read More

26 October 2015

Funny English Jokes -1

10/26/2015 04:53:00 PM  , , ,  No comments

Penguins Going to the Zoo
A truck driver was driving 100 penguins to the New York Zoo when his truck broke down on the freeway. The driver got out of the cab and was looking at the engine when a second truck driver stopped in front of him and asked if he needed any help. The penguins' driver explained that he is taking the penguins to the zoo and asked if the other man would take the penguins there. He agreed. Some hours later, the second truck driver drove past the first one, who was still waiting on the freeway for help to come. The penguins, however, were still on the truck! "I thought I asked you to take those penguins to the zoo," shouted the first driver. The second replied, "I did, but I had some money left, so we're going to the cinema now."
The Cookies !!
One day, while my friend and I were traveling through Germany, we were veryhungry but we didn't have a lot of money. We decided to stop at a village marketto get a few groceries. I chose some cookies and went to the front counter to pay. Near the counter I saw some packaged cookies in a large bin. They looked good and were a lot cheaper than the ones I had in my hand, so I took them instead. We left the store and looked for a place where we could eat. We found a quiet place under a tree and we ate our sandwiches first, and then the cookies. We thought they were great.
"Let's get these again," I said. "They're cheap and they really taste good."
My friend can read some German, but I can't, so I gave her the package so she could look for the brand name. She looked at it and then started to laugh
"Why are you laughing?" I asked.
"Because they're dog biscuits!" she said.

Picasso (A True Story)
One day, a famous art collector was having a party. He had many famous paintings on his walls. He saw one man studying his favourite painting which was above his fireplace. He said to the man, “This is a real Picasso.”.
The man shook his head. He said, “I am an art expert.
This definitely isn’t a real Picasso. It is a fake.”
The art collector was shocked.
He called up his agent and asked to have a personal appointment with Picasso.The meeting was arranged and he flew to Paris. He went directly to Picasso’s studio and after climbing the stairs, knocked on the door. Picasso shouted, “Come in!”. Picasso was busy painting a large painting. He quickly looked over his shoulder and asked, “What is it? I’m busy.”

The art collector said, “Mr. Picasso I only have one quick question. Can you please look at this painting and tell me if it is a fake?”

Picasso looked over his shoulder at it and quickly snapped, “It is a fake”. The collector thanked Picasso and left.

One year later, the collector returned to Picasso’s studio. He walked up the stairs and knocked on the door. Picasso was busy painting and he angrily asked, “What is it?!”

The art collector said, “Picasso, sorry to interrupt but I have just one question. Can you look at this painting and tell me if it is a fake?” Picasso looked over his shoulder and quickly replied, “It is a fake!” The man was shocked, he said, “It can’t be! I was here last year and saw you, yourself, painting this very painting!Picasso turned around and said,

“Sometimes I paint fakes.
Stevie Wonder
One day, Stevie Wonder (the blind singer), came to Toronto to perform. He was taken to his hotel room. He decided to take a nap but didn’t like the sheets, he wanted silk sheets.

Rather than bother the hotel staff, he decided to go buy some himself. He asked his personal manager if there was a store nearby where he could buy silk sheets.

The manager replied, “Yes, there is a big department store. It is called, Canadian Tire. I can go buy you some.”

Stevie Wonder didn’t want to bother his manager.

He said, “Just take me there, I can get them.

I want the right kind.”

So the manager took Stevie Wonder to the car

and they drove to Canadian Tire. Upon arriving, Stevie Wonder got out of the car and his manager tried to help him. Stevie Wonder said,

“Let me go alone, I can do it by myself.”

Stevie Wonder went into the department store and went to the back. All the staff was looking at him, whispering and pointing. “Oh my god! It is Stevie Wonder!” Stevie Wonder was feeling around and things were crashing to the floor, everything was

falling everywhere as he searched. The store manager went to his employees and said,

“Someone quick, go help Mr. Wonder!”

A young teenager said , “I will”. He went to the back of the store where Stevie Wonder was busy crashing things to the floor and searching blindly. The young clerk tapped Stevie Wonder on the shoulder and asked, “May I help you Mr. Wonder? “

Stevie Wonder turned around, shook his head and said,

“NO, I’M JUST LOOKING”
The Fish Tale
It was a cold winter day when an old man walked out onto a frozen lake, cut a hole in the ice, dropped in his fishing line and began waiting for a fish to bite. He was there for almost an hour without even a nibble when a young boy walked out onto the ice, cut a hole in the ice not to far from the old man and dropped in his fishing line.

It only took about a minute and WHAM!, a Largemouth Bass hit his hook and the boy pulled in the fish.

The old man couldn't believe it but figured it was just luck. But the boy dropped in his line and again within just a few minutes pulled in another one. This went on and on until finally the old man couldn't take it any more since he hadn't caught a thing all this time. He went to the boy and said, "Son, I've beenhere for over an hour without even a nibble. You have been here only a few

minutes and have caught about half a dozen fish! How do you do it?" To which the boy responded, "roo raf roo reep ra rums rrarm."

"What was that?" The old man asked.

Again the boy responded, "roo raf roo reep ra rums rarrm."

"Look" said the old man, "I can't understand a word you are saying."

So the boy spit into his hand and said, "You have to keep the worms warm!
The Suicides
An American, A Frenchman and a Korean were working on a skyscraper being built in Seoul. They worked hard all morning. When it was lunch, they took the elevator up to the top of the very high building and sat on the edge eating their lunches.

The American opened his lunch box and said, “Damn! Peanut butter and jam sandwiches again! If I get peanut butter and jam again, I’m gonna jump off this building.”

The Frenchman opened up his lunch. “Mon Dieu! Cheese sandwiches again! If I get cheesesandwiches again, I’m gonna jump off this building.”

The Korean opened up his lunch box. “Shxxxxx! Kimchee. If I get kimchee again for lunch, I’m going to jump off this building.”

The next day, the 3 men did the same thing. They worked hard all morning and then went up to the top of the building, sat on the edge and began to eat lunch. The Korean looked in his lunch box first. “Shexxxx! Kimchee!” He stood up and jumped off the

building. The American looked in his lunch box. “Damn! Peanut butter and jam!” He stood up and jumped off the building.

The Frenchman looked in his lunch box. “Merde! Cheese sandwiches!” He stood up and jumped off the building.

The next day, the newspapers were full of stories about the 3 construction workers who killedthemselves. Everyone wondered why? Even the police had no answers. A few days later at the funeral for the men, the 3 wives were talking. The Korean’s wife said, “I don’t understand. He loved kimchee and always asked me for it.”The American’s wife said, “I don’t understand either.

He loved peanut butter since he was a young boy.” The Frenchman’s wife said, “I don’t understand

either.

HE MADE HIS OWN LUNCH EVERYDAY!
The Genie
A Frenchman, an Englishman and a German were travelling in a boat from France to Australia. Unfortunately, the boat sank but the three men swam to a small island. There was nobody on the island and the men waited for two months. No boat came to rescue

them. They were very unhappy.

“We will have to live here forever.” said the Englishman

“ We will have to eat bananas every day.” said the German

“We will never see our families again.” said the Frenchman.

One day, while walking along the beach, they found a bottle. They opened the bottle and out came a genie. The genie said, “Thank you for letting me out of the bottle. I was inside for

500 years! Now I am free. I will give you each one wish.”

The German said, “I want to be back in German at a soccer game. With a beer and sausage and singing songs in the stadium.”

“POOF”, “Your wish is granted” said the genie. The German was back in Germany.

The Frenchman said, “I want to be at the dinner table with my family in France, eating cheese, drinking wine.”

“POOF”, “Your wish is granted” said the genie. The Frenchman was back in France. The Englishman just looked at the genie. The genie said, “Hurry up! I want to enjoy my freedom.”

The Englishman thought for a moment and said, “I am rather lonely here. Can you bring back my two friends?”

“Poof”, the German and the Frenchman were back on theisland.
Read More
Subscribe to: Posts (Atom)